I turned 61 years old which is so to say “the retirement age”. The retirement age of European schools might be 65 years old, and many educators stay for another 2-3 years which makes the appointment of the young people difficult. Teaching requires years of experience, so the retirement age is a very difficult issue.
For soloist every performance is like a debut performance.
Beethoven, Mozart, violin concerto by Mendelssohn,… Every repertoire scares me. I always get tense playing music as if I am playing it for the first time. Yes, it is like a debut. My teacher Rudolf Serkin once told me “every concert is a debut concert!” as I told him that I was afraid of my own debut. He was already 80 years old at that time. What an amazing life that great soloist had!
Martha Argerich is 78 years old, and she still plays the piano concerto by Tchaikovsky brilliantly. No octave can stop her. I am so fortunate to witness those great people who are a wonderful guidance in my life.
Sometimes I do not have concerts and it could last for few months, It feels like retirement life.
My longest absence from concerts was about 6 months, and it was when my second child, my son Samon, was born. Those were the toughest days of my life. The artistic world I am in has completely changed which has really worn me out physically. I jumped into the children’s world and became a member of the parents’ society. I was always outside with my children as I turned out to be the most tanned jury of the Queen Elisabeth International Music Competition.
I do not remember how I came back to the world of performing arts. Since a debut and a retirement comes one after another, the sense of retirement might have a different meaning in my life.
What next? Any other favorite things to do? In my daily life, I always do what I want to do, so what then?
I used to think of travelling along the Silk Road.
In my youth, I was so excited to read about an archaeologist excavating the Silk Road and the trip to the “Taklamakan Desert” and “Lop Nur (Lop Lake)”.
A few years ago we went on a trip to Turkey which was our only family vacations. We were so excited to travel from Antalya to Konya and Cappadocia. Looking at the East, yes there is the Silk Road in front of me!
It’s still just a dream though.
Last year, I visited Sion in Switzerland. Walking in the mountains, I was completely fascinated by the place and felt that I wanted to live in this splendid place. Less than 1000 meters above sea level with vineyards in front of you, the Alpine top covered with snow far ahead, grapes slightly sweet or bitter to quench your thirst, and of course delicious wine. I always associate Switzerland with an upper class society difficult to approach, but now my fluency in French allows me to feel closer to the country.
My mother used to visit the temple in Kohya-san (Mt. Kohya) to pray at the beginning of each month.
Now my life is a bit like my mother’s, preparing meals in the kitchen alone watching TV programs about mountains. It is almost a retired life,,, no special plans for the future. Sometimes I wonder where I am.
I will go on with joy and with fear! “What I want to do” is my driving force, believing my impression. I am so grateful to my dear family and precious friends, because I know one day in the future people will find themselves alone